3 posts in one day?!

So I had a few more pictures I wanted to add.

She sure enjoys walks. Tonight we went early (6-ish). It was so stinking hot that we should have gone at 9, like we usually do. It is easier once the sun is down because we don't have to be so worried about blocking the sun from her eyes. Doesn't Jon look happy!

I asked Taelyn to smile for mommy so I could take a picture. This was the response I got. Like everything else she does, it made me laugh!

Yesterday, someone made the comment that they liked the crazy haired pictures of Taelyn that I had already posted. They said that it reminded them of Doc on Back to the Future. I had to add these pictures because...well...if you thought that hair was crazy, check this out!

There is that ever present tongue! By far her favorite body part.

My Working Mother Woes

So I go back to work tomorrow. I've been dreading it, but it came, none the less. I had been fearing the emotional difficulties that would come with going back to work. Up to this point, I've only been away from Taelyn for one to one and a half hours at a time. I don't know how I'm going to get through the 8.5!

On top of the emotional time factor, she won't be in day-care at the county building as I had planned. I went in in December to put my name on a list. Apparently that was not soon enough. Live and learn. I called two weeks after she was born and they said they were glad to know I was still interested, call back in a week or two. I called back two weeks later, and got the same response. After repeating this one more time, I was super frustrated. I called back the following week and asked more questions. They had one opening for July, and it was filled. I did find out that they take 8 infants at a time. At the age of 1, the infants are moved up to the toddler class. Right now, they are waiting for the kindergarten age kids to start school. At that point, everyone will be bumped up a class and the older infants will be able to move up, leaving openings in the infant room. When I called back to let them know I wanted them to keep me on the waiting list, they let me know that the parents of the July baby were not sure if they wanted the opening. That was one bright weekend of hope. When I called back on Tuesday, as I had been asked to do, they let me know that the opening was taken after all. All my hope was dashed! OK, so it wasn't that awful. For July, I'm only working two days a week. I found a lady in our ward who will watch her for the 10 days I will be working in July. I'm hoping that by that time, there is an opening at the county building. If not, we may have to get creative!

So, on top of the emotional difficulties caused by being away from Taelyn and the day-care hold up...we had an eating dilemma. First, I didn't start pumping until yesterday (that is a long story in and of itself-and I'll spare you the details). So I've been trying like mad to get enough for tomorrow. Almost there. Second, I forgot about the joys of trying to bottle feed. We had given her formula in a bottle on several occasions. She took it fine. Well, last night she won't have anything to do with formula. She pulled faces, and spit every drop of it back out. Jon decided to be sneaky and feed it to her in the syringe that we give her Gripe Water in. She loves her Gripe Water and it sure does help settle her tummy. She grinned when Jon put the end of the syringe in her mouth. Imagine her face when she was expecting one of her favorite things, and was given her least favorite. She was not happy with either of us. Despite the desperation we were feeling, it made us both laugh so hard it brought tears to our eyes. We then tried to feed her breast milk. Still nothing. She pulled faces when ever the nipple touched her tongue. She wouldn't even close her mouth around it. Today I went to The Lactation Station for help. The lady recommended a $14 bottle. I asked if they had any nipples shaped like her Nuk. In a manor I found to be quite snooty, she said "We don't carry that kind of nipple." I was willing to try anything, so I bought the $14 bottle and a new pacifier shaped like the bottle nipple. After 1/2 hour of wailing (her, not me) and more tears than my heart can handle (again, her-not me...well, mostly), I gave up. I could get her to take the new pacifier, but she still wanted nothing to do with a bottle. My mom suggested I get a Nuk nipple. Jon stopped by the grocery store on the way home. $4 later, we had success! She still doesn't care for bottle feeding, but she has taken 2 bottles now, and I am confident she isn't going to starve to death tomorrow. Nuk, I love you!

Taelyn's Baby Blessing

So Jon blessed little Taelyn yesterday. It was beautiful. Like everything I have experienced in the last two months, it didn't quite seem real. I still stop sometimes and think, "Oh my gosh! I'm a mother!" During the blessing, nothing I did could keep my eyes dry. I feel so blessed to have this precious little one and have the opportunity to teach her and watch her grow.

I'd like to thank all those who were able to come and enjoy it with us. We appreciate all the love and support.

Following church, we had a lunch for the family members who were able to stay. It sure was nice to see everyone. I'm grateful for the love and support that Jon's family shows me. I couldn't have married into a better family.

I was in such a rush yesterday that I didn't even get pictures of anything. I didn't get pictures at the lunch, let alone Taelyn in her blessing dress! We're going to go get them done next week. I'll post them then. For now, this is it.

I had wanted to make Taelyn's dress. I planned on making it while my mom was staying with us the first week after Taelyn was born. HAH! That was naive of me, wasn't it. Needless to say, my mom ended up doing all of the machine work that first week. She left all the hand work for me. I did the beading, sewed on extra flowers, stitched the hem, turn under and stitched the lining and added a few too many snaps down the back. It took more time than I anticipated, and I was lucky to get it all done during Taelyn's naps. Thanks, Mom, for the help. It sure did look beautiful on her.

Growing like a weed

So several weeks have passed since the last post, and more time than that since I added new pictures. It's time.

She is growing so much. From our crude weighing techniques (the difference between Jon on the scale with a naked Taelyn and Jon alone), she is nearly ten pounds. She has found her voice, has rolled over once, smiles when she recognizes mommy and daddy, and holds her head up on her own. She is growing up so fast. She also now cries to notify me of her displeasure of being neglected when I set her on my lap to trade sides when feeding her. That last one I could do without, but it does make me laugh.

Well, here are some more pictures. The first set is when I was deciding what to do with her hair for the baby blessing. I put gel in her hair with a flower that matches those on her dress. I'll add several of those, because I appreciate the faces she pulls.

Here is what usually happens when Jon comes home from work...

I'll give him credit, he does change her diaper first!

This next one is her favorite possition to sleep in. We usually put her to bed swaddled...but by morning, her arms are always up. Well, at least when I swaddle her. She always seems to get loose no matter how tight I swaddle her. Jon, on the other hand, is a pro.

Just a couple of sleeping pictures. You can't see it well, but yes, I painted her finger nails. Her toes match.

We have a small, pillow sized bean bag that some friends are letting us borrow. It is great! It allows us to jiggle her down into it, so that we can put her down without having to worry about her scooting away. This next set is some that I took today while she was on the bean bag. We had just gotten home from church and she was in an adorable dress that you can't see. I didn't think to change her when we got home, because clothes are clothes, right? Well, by the end of our nap, she had managed to explode out the back of her diaper. Next time, I'll get her out of the cute little outfits sooner.

Time flies when...

Wow! Time sure does fly. I'm not sure that I would say that it has all been 'fun'... but it sure has been an interesting experience.

So I assumed that I would blog a ton. I haven't had a chance to take pictures or send out thank you cards and birth announcements. I had no idea that I would be too physically and emotionally exhausted to do much of anything this last month.

This week we had our 1 month appointment. Taelyn got her Hep B shot and was weighed. When we went in for our 2 week appointment, she had dropped from her birth weight of 7 lbs 12 oz to 7 lbs 1 oz. On Tuesday, her weight was up to 8 lbs 11 oz. She looks like she has grown so much. I'm so glad she was as small as she was at birth. I think about Colton, Truck and Taryn who were all 8 and 9 pounders and I cringe. I think about Darla's first who weighed over 10 pounds... I can't imagine giving birth to her at this size, let alone larger!

After her Hep B shot, I hadn't thought to give her anything. She started being very fussy and lethargic. She is such an angel and her behavior was very uncharacteristic. It worried us. I called the doctor and they had me bring her back in yesterday. Dr Cox (our wonderful pediatrician) said everything looks fine. Talk about a scare. She is acting much better today.

Well, as far as having a baby goes, I only have one gripe. No one really talks about how difficult it is!! I only had one person mention it, my cousin Amy. When Amy had her first, I asked her how it was. Her response surprised me. She said, "It's SO hard! It's so much fun... BUT IT'S SO HARD!" I thought that was interesting. At the baby shower, the advice she gave me was "It gets better". I thought it can't really be that bad. I'm grateful for Amy's comments. They made me realize that I'm not awful for feeling so wholly overwhelmed this last month. I'm grateful for Darla, Nancy, Travis and Melissa, and random strangers that I get to have conversations with: for Emily, who I met while we were feeding our babies in the mothers lounge at a wedding reception; and for Stephanie, who is in the YW presidency in the 4th ward and I met while I was at the church Tuesday night waiting for Jon to do interviews.

I will admit one thing. I have a whole new outlook on motherhood. I can not express just how much more reverence I hold for the divine role of Motherhood. I find myself more in awe of all the amazing mothers around me. I am more grateful for my own mother and all that she has done and sacrificed for me and my siblings. I'm sure that as our little one grows, I will only continue to develop a greater appreciation for this new road I am traveling and for all those who have made the journey before me.

Tagged

I've been tagged by Kirstine Clark (Jon's sister).

Tidbits about me.

A. ATTACHED OR SINGLE? Very Attached

B. BEST FRIEND? Jonathan, then my Mom and Mag (my nick-name for Taryn...long story).

C. CAKE OR PIE? Depends on the type. Mom's Carrot Cake or Italian Creme Cake would top any pie in my book...but Aun's mom's Cherry Cream and Cherry Apple pies would come in a close 3rd and 4th.

D. DAY OF CHOICE? Saturday. Jon is home...and I can shower in the morning. I still haven't figured out what to do with Taelyn so I can get ready in the morning.

E. ESSENTIAL ITEMS? Kirk said Diaper wipes. I would have to agree. Taelyn had an explosion while I was changing her diaper today. I couldn't find wipes ANYWHERE! I'll never be caught without them again.

F. FAVORITE COLORS? Purple (most shades)

G. GUMMY BEARS OR WORMS? Gummy worms.

H. HOMETOWN? Neola, Utah.

INDULGENCE? I used to have those...I just don't remember what they are right now. I'd give anything for a shower and a good back rub (hint-hint Jon).

J. JANUARY OR JULY? July. I'm ready for walks in the park.

K. KIDS? 1 adorable daughter now...16 days old.

L. LIFE ISN’T COMPLETE WITHOUT? Spending time with my family.

M. MARRIAGE DATE? May 14, 2005

N. NUMBER OF BROTHERS AND SISTERS? 2 brothers and 1 sister.

O. ORANGES OR APPLES? Oranges. I could eat them any time. I have to be in the mood for apples and they have to be the right kind.

P. PHOBIAS OR FEARS? 2. Losing one of my family members, or getting in a car accident with Taelyn.

Q. QUOTE? I'm sure I could look up something good...but I only really have one memorized that I reference often. "For the want of a nail, the shoe was lost; for want of a shoe, the horse was lost; for want of a horse, the rider was lost, being overtaken and slain by the enemy. All for the want of care about one horse shoe nail." May not be an exact quote-but it is close to that. By Thomas Jefferson. I usually only quote the last bit.

R. REASON TO SMILE? Seeing Taelyn smile or watching her and Jon.

S. SUPERMAN OR WONDER WOMAN? Wonder Woman all the way!

T. TAG 5 PEOPLE… Jenni Oman, Darla Locher, Holly Schulthess, Valarie Dye and Andrea Smith.

U. UNKNOWN FACT ABOUT ME: I have won two state sewing competitions, and competed nationally...but truth be told, I absolutely hate sewing. I have made quilts before and loved it. Part of me wonders if I learned to hate sewing because of the scrutiny of the competitions...

V. VEGETABLES? Most. During the summer my favorites (has to be from the garden) are Mom's fried squash/zucchini or her creamed peas and potatoes, or Dad's oil and vinegar cucumbers. Makes my mouth water just thinking about it...

W. WORST HABIT? You can only have your worst habit posted on the internet so long before it has to be taken off!

X. X-RAY OR ULTRASOUND? Ultrasound

Y. YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? Thia food. However, I could really go for some pizza right now. I'm excited that I'm no longer pregnant and so I should be able to keep it down now!

Z. ZODIAC SIGN? Virgo

Our New Addition

Taelyn Elsa Woodland

Born May 5, 2008 at 10:24 am

7 pounds 12 ounces, 21 1/2 inches

AND LOTS OF HAIR!

Now for the good stuff...the pictures!!

She's not too happy in this pic...but I can't say that I blame her.

The only thing on our birth plan that went as we wanted it to was that Jon got to cut the umbilical cord.

The next 4 pictures are pictures that they took in the hospital. She was a day old at the time.

The last one I really didn't like because of the face she is pulling. We took one of our own when she wasn't so upset, but it turned out a little dark.

She looks so precious in daddy's arms.

Check out that angel face.

Her hair is about 1 1/2 inches at the nape of her neck.

She has long, long toes.

The picture doesn't do them justice.

This is the one I don't like as much.

It isn't bad, but when compared to the first 2...

she just doesn't look too happy.

Here is our attempt...but it was a little dark.

She doesn't look nearly as angry though!

Here they are. Daddy and Taelyn.

He is a wonderful father and a huge help to me.

He loves her so much...

and she sure loves him, too.

Now we get into the pictures when we left the hospital.

They sure enjoy taking naps together.

I'm glad I took this picture when she was happy...

baths have been a little more traumatic since then!

She looks so sweet. This is actually a posed picture that my mom took. My mom got a little picture happy!

We want to thank my mother. She came out and stayed with us for a week. We really appreciated it. She had the baby sleep in the living room with her. She brought her in when she needed fed. It allowed Jon and I some much needed sleep for a few nights. Also, it was nice to have someone at home with me during the day while Jon was at work. She spent lots of time sewing and holding the baby. When Jon came home, she would usually go out and shop for girls camp stuff or fabric until 9 or 9:30. We appreciated her giving us that time together, too.

My dad came out the evening Taelyn was born. It was cute to watch him with her. When the nurse came in to take her vitals, she asked dad if she could take the baby for a minute. He said no! I think he realized she wasn't going away until she got the baby. Dad finally relented.

Oh, and my mom doesn't have any horses any more. Dad promised them all to Taelyn. Under normal circumstances, I don't think mom would have taken kindly to having her horses stolen...but she didn't seem to mind too much. Mom is making bumper pads and a blanket for the cradle. Wouldn't you know, the fabric is pink...with horses.

Labor and Delivery

So, I had been anticipating putting pictures up as soon as I got home from the hospital...but I had neglected to actually make sure we had internet before going into the hospital... Something I should have thought through better, but got neglected. I hadn't anticipated being so sore that I really wouldn't want to go anywhere to get a wireless connection. Earlier this week Jon called to get us a high speed hookup. THANK YOU JON!

I can now feel reconnected to the rest of the world (haven't gotten out much in the last two weeks...).

So, May 3rd (Saturday), I had contractions all afternoon. My mom asked if they were getting stronger. I told her I didn't know what she meant. She let me know that I would know when that was happening. Mom called a lot that day and kept asking if she should come out. Said she didn't want to miss anything. Dad called at 7 and asked where I was at and when the baby was coming. He said mom was ready to sell the farm and move to Salt Lake. I convinced him that I didn't think it was time yet and he said they would wait. At 11 that night, the contractions quit.

May 4th (Sunday). I slept for a few hours, but the contractions started up again at 3. They were strong enough that I couldn't go back to sleep. I got up and did dishes. Mid-process, I knew exactly what my mom had meant when she asked if they were getting stronger. My eyes went wide, I had to brace myself against the cupboards, and I went up on my toes. Basically, it kind of freaked me out. When it finished, I was super excited because it meant we were getting closer to having our little angel. Shortly after, I found the first tinges of blood. Jon was excited and worried. So much so that he called the midwife. She informed us that it was probably just from the contractions, and that for first time mothers, they liked us to have 2 hours of 4 minute contractions before going into the hospital--but if they got down to 3 minute contractions, we needed to get to the hospital immediately.

Throughout the day, my contractions continued. They were never really consistent. They ranged from 30 minutes to 2 1/2 minutes apart. By that time, mom was getting frantic (she will claim she wasn't--but she was). Later that evening my ability to convince her that it wasn't time wore off. They were already packed and her and Taryn headed out.

Travis stopped by that evening to help Jon. He had been calling periodically to check on our status. While he was here, Melissa called on his cell. He let her know how we were doing. He handed me the phone and we talked for a minute. She offered their tub. Now our tub is just deep enough to cover my legs, and just long enough for me to sit with my legs straight. Their tub is huge, with jets. I accepted and Melissa said she would have it filled when we got there. That was when Mom and Taryn got here. I felt bad leaving them at my apartment while we went to Travis and Melissa's...but the tub was just too enticing. When we got there, the tub was full and the lights were off, candles lit, and music was playing. I appreciate them so much. We were only there 45 minutes to an hour, but it was wonderful. That was when the contractions got really strong in my back and 3 minutes apart. We decided it was time (around 10-10:30 pm). We tried to sneak out, but they heard us and came down stairs as we were leaving. They wished us luck and we were on our way.

Mom and Taryn followed us to the hospital. Mom joked later that Jon's speed was really variable on the way. She figured that he was speeding up when I was having a contraction. Not true. He would slow down to the speed limit during the contractions while I was distracted. When it passed, I would look at his speed and let him know that I was in labor and it was OK to go faster. He would then speed up to 8 miles over the speed limit...but when a contraction would start and I would quit prodding him to go faster, he would slow down again. We repeated this process all the way to the hospital.

When we walked into the labor and delivery unit, the lady at the desk asked what we were there for. Jon, in his frantic and frustrated state, told her that he had twisted his ankle and wanted it looked at. I agree with him. My belly was huge (see pic taken May 4)

and I was obviously in labor. I had asked about preregistration at the midwife clinic and they said their patients were automatically pre-registered (they are located on the floor just above the labor and delivery unit). We found out that wasn't true. That took FOREVER! Not really-but it sure seemed like it. At the end she asked me to glace over the information and make sure it was correct. I wasn't completely focused, but it still threw me when I didn't understand what I was looking at. She had handed me someone else's information sheet. Ugh-check in was a nightmare. By the time we where done, it was midnight.

May 5th (Monday). Well, the rest is really a blur to me. We had done really well with the Hypnobirthing to that point. We were 90% effaced and dialated to a 7. But then things kind of fell apart. My contractions changed. I no longer felt anything in the front or bottom...but everything was in the back and legs. Every contraction, my back would feel like it was on fire and I would have shooting pains on the outside of my legs from my hips to my knees. I lost my focus and fell apart. I got in the jetted tub there, but it didn't help much. After 1/2 an hour, the shooting pains in my legs didn't go away between contractions any more. Jon was a gem through it. He would hold me during each contraction and rub my back. Unfortunately, where to rub and the amount of pressure changed almost constantly. He was very patient as my demands (I'm pretty sure that is how they came out) changed. That was when Jon and I decided to get an epidural. It was a busy night there, so it still took quite a while for the anesthesiologist to get there. The baby's heart rate wouldn't accel like they wanted it to, so they wouldn't give me anything else while we waited for him. I don't know what time he came. I just remember him asking questions during my contractions and expecting me to answer. He finally said he had 4 more ladies he still needed to see and if I couldn't answer his questions he would have to come back later. That snapped me into it. Within 10 minutes I had answered his questions, and everything was done. I have to agree with Meadow...drugs are good. I don't know how much more of the back and leg pain I could have taken.

Anyway, the epidural, of course, slowed everything down. Several hours later, I had still only dialated another centimeter. The midwife talked about options, and they broke my water at around 3 am. A little while later, nothing much had changed. We agreed to the pitocin and the internal fetal monitor. They told me to sleep. I was excited at the chance. A little later, they came and gave me oxygen to help the baby's heart rate. From then on, I didn't really sleep. I noticed that when I was awake and breathing from the oxygen mask in deep, controlled breaths, her heart rate was fine. As I started dozing, my breaths shortened and her heart rate sped up. I opted to focus on my breathing.

I don't remember when we started pushing, but Jon said it was around 5...I thought it was closer to 6, but like I said...I really don't remember. After a while at pushing (again, no concept of time), they decided that I needed a rest and that the baby wasn't progressing because she was off to my right side. They had me lay on my left side, nearly on my stomach, for an hour to she if she would move to the center. I'm grateful for this time. I didn't sleep, but I did rest. Also, the effects of the epidural were lessening and I could feel the desire to push. I couldn't feel the actually contractions, but I was able to focus on the muscles that wanted to push. It helped me to get a feel for where I was supposed to be pushing...because no matter what they say, it IS NOT the same muscles you use for having a bowel movement.

Anyway, we pushed again for a while. Then I knew something was wrong. One nurse came in and examined me, then she went and got someone else, then they got someone else. I don't remember the acronyms they used, but she was still off center to my right, rotated 45 degrees and she hadn't dropped below a 0 on the pelvic stationing.

Well, to make a longer story a little shorter, there were a ton of people in the room. Me, Jon (moral support), Mom and Taryn (self appointed cheering squad who huddled on the couch trying to stay out of the way), the midwife and her two nurses, the labor and delivery nurse, Doctor Jackson and his resident assistant and a student, and 3 NICU staff, just in case. Doctor Jackson said we had three options: forceps, vacuum or c-section. Jon asked what he would do if it was his wife having the baby. Doctor Jackson said he would go with the metal because it gave them a better chance of getting a hold of the baby, helping to move her to the middle, rotate her the right direction, and pull her out. He talked about the bruising that was possible and said that in rare cases, it could cause broken bones. Jon decided that was what we were going to do. When I saw the forceps, I just about died. I was afraid of what they were going to do to my baby. I had to close my eyes and try not to think about it. Several people took a go at trying to get them properly located. Fortunately, they couldn't get a hold of her because of her off-center location and rotation. They decided to do a last ditch effort with the vacuum before going with a c-section. The resident assistant took over the vacuum. It was small, which was comforting after seeing the forceps. The first pull, the vacuum came off. It splattered blood all over the walls and the resident assistant. The doctor leaned over to her and said "and that is why you never sit directly in front of them". It grossed Taryn out. I think it may have phased her for life. Anyway, during the pull, the baby dropped a little. They were encouraged. They reattached the vacuum. That last time, I pushed for all I was worth. I think I pushed and they pulled through 2 contractions. Literally, she popped out. As Doctor Jackson started sewing me back up, the stitches he was taking became more and more noticeable. I hit the button to increase the epidural, but nothing happened. I had been aware that the feeling was coming back when they were working with the forceps, but the adrenaline helped a lot. As that wore off, I felt more of what was happening. They ended up having to give me a shot to deaden the area. I guess I tore pretty bad, inside and out. The doctor told my mom that he had never seen anyone swell as bad as I did.

It was so wonderful to finally see her and have her in my arms. It wasn't how I had imagined my labor and delivery going...but it was worth every second. I hardly noticed the hour that it took to get me stitched back up.

My not so positive attitude

So, here I am at work...again. Even though we were counting down to May 5, part of me was still hoping for an April baby. Every night I get my hopes up because my contractions increase. Every morning I wake up and glare at the clock. I never have been a very patient person. It is doubtful that that is going to change any time soon. I appreciate Jon, who is trying to help by coming up with something fun to do together every night to occupy our time. Last night we went to dinner and rented a couple movies.

Oh, and my not-so-morning morning sickness hit again last night. Holding out to the very end.

OK, enough pessimism. If I don't go into labor today, I get to go to Jenni's graduation party tonight. CONGRATULATIONS JENNI! You made it! I still admire you for finishing your masters. By the time I finally got done with my bachelors...nothing could have made me keep going! Congrats again.

May Day!

Well, April came and went. May is here. Guess that means Taelyn will be a May baby.

I hit that depressed point. It takes everything I have to make myself get up and go to work each morning. Yesterday my boss talked to me about coming in on Monday if I haven't had the baby. I wanted to cry... I spent all of yesterday contemplating what to do with my schedule. I think I'm going to agree to come in next week if she hasn't come, on the condition that I come in in the morning and leave early. I'll use vacation time to cover the remainder of my shift. Right now, I'm very energetic and work well in the morning. About 2 o'clock I run down. By 3, I'm ready to die.

That is about the extent of my thoughts for today.

Oh, and I didn't clean the car last night. I cleaned the Relief Society closet. One less thing for the new RS president to do once she is called. It should be on Sunday, but we have been thinking that for 3 weeks now. It has made things difficult. She has been ready to pick things up, and I have been ready to let them go. We are in this limbo state where we are trying not to step on each others toes. Ya, I know who it is. Just happens that way when you are in a small ward. Bishop told me I was going to be released. Right after Sacrament Meeting, he called her in. I had my suspicions, but I knew for sure when she started asking me more questions and taking notes. I asked and she confirmed. It has made for a nice transition because I have been able to take time before the baby comes to fill her in on as much as I know. As I remember something else, I just shoot her an email. Come Sunday, it should be official. Don't get me wrong. I have loved my calling. These past months have just been a little too much for me in my pregnant, emotional, moody state!